The Other Side of the Coin is Rusting

“We all are living our lives according to our wish” is what we claim but ideally none of us are having a life which we really wanted, but are having one which is purely driven by the standards / image we set among our self in a group of people. This particular blog tell about some of the darker side in the persona’s we usually come across. It might be a bit complicated to understand the entire theme of the write-up we have here but let me beg your pardon to tune your mindset to a level where you could feel that the writer is trying to fit you in somewhere or the other as a protagonist and the protagonist is also the antagonist.
You were told by the author that we are dealing with the darker side of a persona but please remember the darker side is not exactly the person’s psychological darkness [admitting a few of the readers might have and a few might not] but it’s purely the other dark side where one try to over come the original psychological thought process provokingly but not showing out because to maintain the image and the standards set by them among the others.
I’m also able to see the reader’s face shrinking out when reading these lines having a thought process in mind about what exactly this guy is willing to tell and conclude, wait dear one’s the article is still left out.
Whenever we have a couple of people coming together, we have a structure of having a differentiation among the people surrounded. The differentiation is basically categorized by a couple of general terms as age, gender, orientation [not the race], literacy, class and the economy of the protagonist.[Please note that every one in the group is a protagonist by himself]. While categorizing every protagonist want to show the ingenuity of theirs by which they make themselves an antagonist as per the author.
The desire to share a care and love is dependent on the categories we defined above but we all somehow have a feel that it should be and is independent. We call our self as independent but somehow or the other we have forced our self to wear a mask on us without or sometime with our knowledge and the mask I quote here is nothing other than our society to which we are bound to control our emotions, thoughts, and feelings. The society I mean is again the same couple of people who are surrounding us [including the protagonist]. The preference to those people / society is again categorized by the same above mentioned terms which altogether lead to tie the thought process entirely, leading to have a prospection which is ultimately different than what we wish to have.
This fact might be hard to digest but the ugly truth is that we never felt liberal towards the practical process of building / bonding a relationship with the category differentiation which we didn’t want to see, but our thought process might have entirely experienced of going ahead in having it. Just because the fear fact that the couple of people together might fit the protagonist to the differentiated category, the protagonist at one stage becomes an antagonist and refuses to agree the wish which was original.
This extremely ends up in showing the shining side of the coin [the protagonist] and ultimately ends up in hiding the other part[the antagonist]…. And please turn back and see… the other side of the coin is rusting………….
to be continued :)

Comments

दर्शन said…
mujhe bahut kam samjh mein aaya ye :P , actually kuch jyada hi bhaari english thi ,
and accroding to our(me u & arun ) conversation on that night , I need a priest to understand it totally ha ha ha :) ...
but I can say the intent/content of the article is good , lot of time we do not ready for "to be honest wid ourself"..
I think you are trying to show the mirror to that personality inside us ..
Gouri Chugh said…
hmmmmm....ur capable of writing bhari bharkam stuff Selva! hehe. ur talking about 2 dimensions of personality. one, embedded in social groups n identities (caste, gender etc.) n d other free of it all- the liberated one. n 4 u it is that other side which is 'rusting', deteriorating n getting suppressed by d one dat is socially embedded. i agree 2 it n also believe that it is difficult 2 break d chains of r identities. like Rudyard kipling had a close bond with india in his childhood but his later traumatic westernisation made him assert his english identity n he asserted d identity of a colonizer cos he didnt want 2 b on d 'weaker' side by asserting an indian identity.(im reading sum stuff on psychoanalysis these days, hehe.) but ponder on it a little- can there nt b more than 2 sides 2 human personality? in dat case u cant use the metaphor of a coin.
anwesha said…
hey selva...to tell you the truth i never knew you really looked at things from thiss perspective but yes this article obviously relates to each one of us.basically in this rat race and in this quest for identity we lose out on a lot of things and the primary being our freedom..to think,to decide,to act the way we really want to.This social structure is so ancient and deep rooted that its hard to break free but ofcors there have been a few who have..take for example the philosophy of existatialism..which to put it crudly means "hell with the world..i am the boss"..i will do what i please..under all circumstances.but this is really fading...we are do much embedded in this close knit society where we view ourselves through the eyes of others..but ofcors there are tmes and there are people who contradict the aforesaid....nevertheless..."man is born free..but in chains everywhere""...the more he tries to break free..the more entanled he gets in the social web..

really nice artcle...keep it up..and hope to read more of ur stuff...;)
selva ganapathy said…
@ Darshan
Arun might be the priest to explain you the things :).. Thanks for a positive review that the intent / content is good.. I'm not trying to show the mirror of the personality its a parda kind of thing in the mind....we want to do it but still won't kind of :)

@ Gouri,
A perfect review :)... Need to have reviews like this. My first try at this bhari bharkam stuff... will write more....As you said there can be more than 2 personalities...but I think I mentioned I'm not talking about the other darker side of the person.. the other darker side may have different personalities altogether... I'm only talking about the think mild screen in our minds in taking up a decision keeping the mask [the society] in mind...you example is perfect match for one such dilemma...

I think my explanation of one pschycological make a clearance that I can use the metaphor of a coin... In case of multiple personality it won't...

Later I'll also come up with articles on multiple personalities of humans surrounding us :)
selva ganapathy said…
There you go Anewsha!,
Rightly pointed out the stuff. Exactly that the philosophy of existentialism is a must for us these days and only a very few go with that :).....you can count in numbers... the people around you.

me trying to make people around me aware that we are in a world where we can go ahead and do what the hell we need to but still sticking to the same old mask and wanting to see a change in others... my next article will be relating this to something else. Keep reading!
selva ganapathy said…
"'difficult to digest'- don't frighten the reader !!"

Agreed.....

"Most societies are heading towards an era of free thinking.. This has its own goods and bads (if seen with convensional standards) or simply the outcomes (if we see things with unbiased eyes)."

The society is heading towards a change for sure but my debate is on an individual :)....

"The point is - you go to New York city, and in some time you'll start behaving like a FREE MAN. Times are changing - Freedom is in the air !!"

When we will go to New York???.. :)....

"But then, what you said is very relevent for each one of us. We make talk about big things but in reality, the trifles do affect us !! So for the time being, I am with you Selva.."

Thanks and I appreciate your review :)
Kalindi Sharma said…
Good attempt Selva but i disagree on a point...
first of all every individual is unique, hence we cant resort to generalization like this, that the side is rusting, for some it does and for some protecting it from rust is the way of life.
At the end of the day all they preach is "Do what you feel you are comfortable with, and what you think is correct"
And People do apply their discretion while doing things which reflects their particular persona, there are times when they go against the social set up they live in, because for them doing what they think is right is more important. Those who abide by it throughout, Anwesha already pointed out what they exactly are, a part of the grand "rat-race".
The kind of mask people wear is again a reflection of their personality, why just two dimensions, a personality is not a flat two-sided coin, its an interaction between the environment we are exposed to and our personal endowments since birth.
In fact talking of existentialism is a huge thing, without going that far let me tell you that any amount of discordance between the "I" and "me" would cause anxiety to an individual, at times even mental imbalance!
And at the end of the day the Human species wants to be at harmony with the "social self" and "personal self".
selva ganapathy said…
Thanks Kalindi!,
Was expecting this kind of a review.

One point which I want to make it.... its upto a person to decide how (s)he will look around the world...and decide what to do... but the point I raise is people stepping back from what they want to do and do things which they really didn't like / want to do....
Else yes...every individual is unique....
"At the end of the day all they preach is "Do what you feel you are comfortable with, and what you think is correct""....exactly...but in this argument this is not happening :)....that is what I took up....saying its rusting...

Yes the rest of the things are taken up and I'll give it a thought and probably my next blog / continuation of this might answer those :)

Thanks again!
Anonymous said…
hhehehhehhehe....frankly i have no words to reiterate the TRUTH...(u have done it very very well).....
yes...we all wear masks each nd every moment..though in our hearts we believe we shud be independent in our thought process...but sumhow i used to find it very normal...maybe coz i have been brought up in this enviro....thanks Selva for awakening my senses :)
selva ganapathy said…
Jyoti!, Yes I agree that we were brought up with such an atmosphere but we do believe that we have the right to take our own decission but we pretend to not take such actions in this kind of case...but really wanted to :)...

Somehow we are in an advanced society [ the whole world around us]....but not in a matured society [the particular set of group whom I call here, make the protagonist the antagonist].

Thanks,
Raj said…
The central nature of any form of existence - a car, a mountain, a human, an animal, etc, is to compete for survival. They are all made of electrons & photons. When there is instability and emptiness, there is a need for fulfillment.

In this competition procreation becomes a tool, a very need based tool, to breed and further your kind. The kind may be a caste, tribe, a pack of lions, a herd of sheep, a clout of locusts, etc.

We being relatively the most advanced beings in nature are only different in one way - We are capable of reasoning. At some point in human history of evolution, we had to have a survival feature and that was reasoning.

Now having grown out of the need to survive in wild environments and compete with other wild elements for survival, we need to fight among territories of comfort - Man's self made imaginary spaces around himself.

TOC is an area around you - a shell, which you define to protect your existence. The harder the competitive environment, the thicker the shell. TOC's protect you for a while, but then, it can also go out of control, as ... by nature we are all competitive... and Selfish!

You really cannot complain, if you are good enough to be competitive ... Be Happy, you are good at what you do. Also, strive to be better ... Now is that not a better way to look at things ... Simple !
selva ganapathy said…
Arun Raj!,
kisi aaur blog mein comment post karni thi aaur voh galti se idhar aa gaya na......its o.k... I excuse you :)

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